INCOMPETENCE BLUES

"I woke up this mornin' and none of the news was good..." sang Steve Earle. Well, usually news is not good in general. Especially when you live on a turd in the Mediterranean (please indulge my poetic incompetence).

I will tell you, if Betfair did Cypriot criminal trials I'd be a rich man by now. No convictions on the Helios case? How come I'm not surprised?
It has nothing to do with justice. It has to do with the incompetence of lawyer civil servants. 'Cause when
was the last time a General Attorney in Cyprus won a big case? You can't remember? Nothing wrong with your memory there. Of course, this degree of incompetence should have repercussions in one's career. In other places they step down or are fired. But in this pinnacle of Democracy that is this country, they hold office for life! Covered by the safety of an asylum veil. Why not prosecute this degree of incompetence that further compromises an already crippled Democracy?

"Let's  talk about a criminal procedure
Throw out the idea of illegal seizure
Put a rope around somebody's neck
Let's hold some bastard up for example
Take his blood and urine sample
Feed him garbage and make him pick up the check"

"HERE IT COMES AGAIN" (Graham Parker)





They should all be accountable. Not untouchable. Instead of covering their ass by manipulating Democracy so that the (short arm of the) law does not reach them. Each and every one of them.
And the high Priests, too. Oh, especially the priests...

"They tell you the preacher was hypocritical
What they don't tell you is that he is typical
What he stands for is totally mythical
And as they lead him away he'll pray for you brother
With a bible in one hand and playboy in the other
Imagine what he does to his mother"

"HERE IT COMES AGAIN" (Graham Parker)





Why not evolve Democracy a bit and invent a new term for civil servants who mess up big time?
Don't get upset. It's just a thought which by all means could be wrong. But think about it. We could
name it Criminal Incompetence. Really, chew some mushrooms and look at the bigger picture.
But I guess, Criminal Incompetence suspects will hire big time lawyers and beat the rap...

"You might be the wrong colour
  You might be too poor
  Justice isn't something just anyone can afford"


"CRIME FOR CRIME" (Ani di Franco)



...and incompetence compromises Democracy and, ultimately, Freedom...

"If you think this country's free you must be
  long on cash and short on scrutiny"



"LONG NIGHT #3652" (Casey Scott)



Sadly, their Criminal Incompetence is indirectly proportionate to our Criminal Apathy...

What we do...

"I remember when we was both out on the boulevard
Talkin' revolution and singin' the blues
Nowadays it's letters to the editor and cheating on our taxes
Is the best that we can do"

"AMERIKA V. 6.0" (Steve Earle)



What they do...

"But hey we can just build a great wall around the country club
To keep the riff raff out until the slump is through
Yeah, I realize that ain't exactly democratic but it's either them or us
And it's the best we can do"

"AMERIKA V. 6.0" (Steve Earle)



We live in a country where the president of the House of Representative is called Yannakis (Little John-
not by any means to be confused with the Robin Hood character).
Is it any wonder we are f****d up as a nation?

"Folks, it's time to evolve. That's why we are troubled.
You know why our institutions are failing us, the church,
the state, everything's failing us?
It's because, ummm-they're no longer relevant...

BILL HICKS



"SO LET'S HOLD SOME BASTARD UP FOR EXAMPLE
TAKE HIS BLOOD AND URINE SAMPLE
REMIND HIM A MAN BELONGS DOWN A MANHOLE"
                                                                        (Graham Parker)

It's Just a Ship of Fools

The recent ChristEars inquiry produced a gem that, sadly, our dimwit paperboys failed to latch on to.
The plea was along the lines of "Indirectly I was responsible, directly(personally) not responsible"
So let me get this right...
A person appears before a judge and is convicted of manslaughter. Gets to do a lot of time.
A person appears before a judge and is convicted of involuntary manslaughter. Gets to do time too, only less.

Still guilty by mine or anyones book.
Case closed.
The "Indignants" are waiting for something of dramatic proportions to happen, but it ain't gonna...
And how could they not see that coming is beyond the grasp of the history of this boat.
-It ain't happening!
-No, it WILL happen!

-Boy, is my thumb NOT really on the pulse of Cyprus...

We're setting sail to the place on the map
From which no one has ever returned
Drawn by the promise of the JOKER and the FOOL
And by the light of the CROSSES that BURN
Drawn by the promise of the women and the lace
And the GOLD and the cotton and pearls
It's a place where they keep all the darkness you need
You sail away from the light of the world on this trip

                                    You will pay tomorrow
                                    You're gonna pay tomorrow

                                    Save me
                                    Save me from tomorrow
                                    I don't want to sail with this ship of fools
                                    ("Ship Of Fools" - WORLD PARTY[Karl Wallinger])


And the "Indignants" are still in the streets from time to time. Of course, not all is well in Los Indignados
front and don't tell me you did not see that coming either! Yes, yes there is a split. A breakaway sect that
is being paraded through shows on TV and radio. The soon-to-appear-on-your-TV-screen-again-or-the Supermarket-near-you "Awoken/Decisive".Yes, there is a difference in opinion. There always is
if you wake up and smell the coffee in these Facebook days.
And as my friend Mike may cynically say : "Opinions are like assholes. Everybody has one", I beg to
differ.
Nostradamus ain't got s**t on Warhol.
I rest my case...

AVARICE and GREED are gonna drive you over the endless sea
They will leave drifting in the shallows or drowning in the oceans of history
Traveling the world you're in search of no good
But I'M SURE YOU'LL BUILD YOUR SODOM like you knew you would
Using all the GOOD PEOPLE for your GALLEY SLAVES
as your little boat struggles through the warning waves

But you don't pay
                                   You will pay tomorrow

                                   Save me
                                   Save me from tomorrow
                                   I don't want to sail in this ship of fools...
                                  ("Ship Of Fools" - WORLD PARTY[Karl Wallinger])

Meanwhile, the dumbfounded, clueless, powerless serfs are still  awaiting for the Surreal Postman to deliver on the promise of a flawed and compromised Democracy and dream of an ideal consciousness

of Utopian proportions.

Which is unreachable...untouchable...ungraspable...

A place to stay

Enough to eat

Somewhere old heroes shuffle safely down the street

Where you can speak out loud about your doubts and fears

And what's more

No one ever disappears, you never hear their standard issue kicking in your door

You can relax on both sides of the tracks

And maniacs don't blow holes in bandsmen by remote control

And EVERYONE HAS RECOURSE TO THE LAW

                           And no one kills the children anymore

                           ("The Gunner's Dream" - ROGER WATERS)

                           ... with thanks to "Pan" for dusting my memory...

PRACTICAL WAYS TO RESURRECT A DEMOCRACY ON LIFE SUPPORT(Part 1)

I don't vote. See, I live around the periphery and none of the incompetents can represent my views. A change of leadership does not interest me. From one incompetent to another. But I salivate at the thought
of the system changing...

We're on our way to find our freedom
And I'm on my way to find you my friend
Where we can stand in the light of the people
And breathe life into the land again
Siyathemba, siyathemba kuwena nkosi
Sizo fika ema khaya
(We are hoping and we still believe
  we will reach our destination)

"When The System Has Fallen" (JOHNNY CLEGG & SAVUKA)



So....how do we go about changing the system. We gotta start someplace and elections is a good place
to start. To be able to run for the Presidency, one incompetent must lay down some money (!!!) plus
produce a paper with signatures that support said incompetent. If you ain't rich or you don't plan to do
favours (rousfeti) you don't have the right to apply for the job (it's a job, that's all), that is how my humble mind translates this.
So...out with these rules and bring in the new ones.
1. All candidates should refrain from accepting cash contributions/grants of any form to boost their  
    campaign. And they should be investigated. And if found out they should be handed a bar of soap
    and sent straight to prison, preferably where the lifers are.
2. Each candidate should be checked to see whether he has grown hairs on his balls. Just pull down his
    pants for everyone to see. Should he have a small dick and is too embarrassed he could go to a photo
    booth and take a close up of his balls (If he submits a photo from the photo booth we'll know that
    there is a possibility he has a small dick too-hey, not all systems are perfect, OK?)
    (Special note to our dimwit lawmakers that this rule DOES NOT apply to women candidates.
     Unless...)
3. Give us the chance to vote the most able. Don't restrict our choice to one single Party. Political
    parties claim to be the cradle of Democracy. That is one reality. Another reality claims that Political
    parties are the asshole of Democracy. (Oh, wouldn't you like to know which books I'm reading...)
4. Most important rule. Have these vain candidates take an IQ test. Make that mandatory. I want to know
    whether my leader is smart or not. And if he cheats me blind, chances are I won't be able to tell and,
    thus, I won't be angry so often...

I would really like to know the IQ test results of our current crop of incompetents cause...

...Then you really might know what it's like
   To sing the blues

"What It's Like" (EVERLAST)





IQ tests, then, for everyone. From the president, to members of parliament, to civil servants.

I've noticed a certain anti-intellectualism going around in this country...I was in Nashville, Tennessee,
and after the show I went to a Waffle House. I'm not proud of it, but I was hungry. And I'm sitting there eating and reading a book. I don't know anybody, I'm alone, so I'm reading a book.
The waitress comes over to me
"What'chu readin' for?"
I had never been asked that. Not "What I'm reading", but "What I'm reading for?"
Goddangit, you stumped me. Hmm, why do I read?
I suppose I read for a lot of reasons, one of the main ones being so I don't end up being a f*****g
waffle waitress .  (BILL HICKS)

ONE BLAST AND ONE HUNDRED HALF-ASSED POLITICOS AND JOURNALISTS

Woke up this morning (unlike a blues song) to the news of the terrible blast that blew away the soul of a nation. Trying to keep the right balance between a bleeding heart and logic, glued to the half-assed radio
stations, trying to decipher their jargon...
Journalists trying to put the blame for the explosion before the relatives of the dead were even informed...
Politicians avoiding to announce the number of the dead...
-It's for someone else to say...
It's nearly 1pm and our half-assed officials refrain from mentioning the number of the dead.
-It's for someone else to say...
We don't deserve these half-assed officials and it's for each and every one of us to say it.

Well here we are in a special place
what are you gonna do here
Now we stand in a special place
what will you do here
WHAT SHOW OF SOUL are we gonna get from you
It could be deliverance, or history,
under these skies so blue,
could be something TRUE
But if I know you you'll bang the drum like monkeys do.

(Don't Bang The Drum-THE WATERBOYS)

It's alright to fall in love, Olivia.

I do it all the time. As a matter of fact, as often as I can.
Right now I'm enamoured with the music of Graveyard.
The Swedes have come up with a scorching 2nd album.
They must've been sleeping with the ghost of the 70's...





So, you see, Olivia...
"Just cause you're the good guy
 It don't mean you're gonna win them all"  

"Errol Flynn" (The Dogs D'Amour)

Of Men and Maggots

(Handsome little girl dressed in virginal white dress spreading joy with her presence. A sight for sore eyes.)

One man, the honorable Zac Koulias (a Groucho Marx lookalike, on the uglier side) has managed to elect the President of the House of Representatives. Can you hear Aristotle's bones rattling?

Give me absolute control
Over every living soul
And lie beside me baby, that's an order!
Take the only tree that's left
And stuff it up the hole
In your culture
Give me back the Berlin Wall
Give me Stalin and St Paul
I've seen the future, brother,
                                                      It is murder!
    
                                                      (The Future-LEONARD COHEN)

(...so the handsome young girl in underwear has pimps circling like buzzards over her head)

A few years back a priest, with 8% of the vote, got elected as the supreme agent of God on the island.
8%! Aristotle's bones rattle like Burundi drums...

You don't know me from the wind
You never did and never will
I was the little jew who wrote the bible
I've seen the nations rise and fall
I've heard their stories, heard them all
But love's the only engine of survival
When they said REPENT REPENT
I wonder what they meant...

                                                      (The Future-LEONARD COHEN)

(...and lady Democracy lies all bruised on a piss drenched pavement, her once beautiful white dress in
tatters and rags...)

Is it any wonder that:
"The whitecoats and the technocrats are warming up their ovens" (David Baerwald)

Now Aristotle meant well, I'm inclined to believe. This nice chap did wonderful work but made an
UNFORGIVABLE mistake. Implementation of his work was to be performed by HUMANS!

I ascribe to Mark Twain's theory that the last person who should be
president is the one who wants it the most. The one who should be
picked is the one who should be dragged kicking and screaming into
the White House.  (BILL HICKS)

I'm Damned if I Do...

...and I'm damned if I don't...Vote!

25% of the voting population who reside on this farm (if you count the ones who did not register) had better things to do last sunday than waste their time casting a vote. I am one of them. The worst thing is
that I have to endure an orchestra of politicians' voices crying out - as if the spotlights from their sorry
stage were stolen - that the right to vote is "sacred" and it's the alpha to omega of Democracy.
Democracy?
Which Democracy?
I certainly do not feel Democracy in my everyday life. May be because perennially politicians have
mangled and compromised Democracy? If Democracy in its pure form existed I might've exercised
my right. But once Democracy is compromised, the right to vote becomes a travesty. I will not be
part of this hypocrisy and will certainly not become a stage for these halfwits to stand on and
celebrate their favorable results. Halfwits preaching to dimwits. Waving flags..."We won, we won..."
What is it about winning? In a land that the ballot box is still sealed with wax, really, what is it about
winning?

Who is the strongest. Who is the best.
Who holds the aces. The East or the West.
This is the crap our children are learning.

But oh, the tide is turning...

("The Tide Is Turning"-ROGER WATERS)


They've all won and still I have no flag to wave...

Bar 2 (maybe 3), politicians in this farm have been schooled to speak the same way. Death by boredom.
They represent cosmotheories that were conceived ages ago. The world has changed so much. Technology and progress have rendered them irrelevant. It is not fashion, it's keeping up with a
changing world. But this characterless strange breed of politicians despise change probably because
they cannot survive in a different environment.

I want to know who the men in the shadows are
I want to hear somebody asking them why
They can be counted on to tell us who are enemies are
But they're NEVER the ones to fight or to die

("Lives In The Balance"-JACKSON BROWNE)


And the press. Mostly incompetent but probably so by default as part of the whole charade...

We got government by ignorance and lots of lobbies in the line
And stick-twirling paintclerks out punching in their time
Dread damaged Democrats dangling for a dime
And paid for paperboys there to keep the public blind

("The Got No Shotgun Hydrahead Octopus Blues" DAVID BAERWALD)


Remember some years ago when the sale of alcohol was forbidden during the 48 hours leading to
election day?
Never quite understood that law. My brain (which won't stop thinking) came up with the most
logical of explanations. After you see the ones that got elected you deffo needed a drink (or two).

I gotta go and tend to my damaged liver...

Puzant (Jean) Nadjarian-Blues Never Fade Away

A dreaded phone call. Disbelief. Mist rushing up to meet the eyes. Anger. Sadness. A cornucopia of memories.
And emptiness...the kind that cannot be replaced....ever.
I never thought that an empty space left within can be cherished so much. It's dead space. It's nothing.
But it's yours. And I will hold on to it until someday, I'll float to meet you...again.
You will have the best seat in the house saved for me and the other kindred spirits. That I'm sure of...
And I smile with the thought that you won't be partying with mother Teresa but in the company of
Wolf, Hooker, Waters and Johnson. With more stories to tell...maybe fill the gaps in Robert Johnson's
story. He came to the crossroads and could not beat the devil. But with you by his side the odds are better...

                            ____________________________________________________

"Has anyone ever written anything for you
  In your darkest sorrow
  Did you ever hear me sing
  Listen to me now
  You know I'd rather be alone
  Than be without you"

  Has Anyone Written Anything For You (Stevie Nicks)











                          ______________________________________________________

"A sadness hidden
  Behind his gaze
  Before his time
  In many ways
  People copy
  Take and steal
  But my friend he was for real"


  An Original Man (Song For Keith)
         THE YARDBIRDS








                            _____________________________________________________

"But there's no rhythm in the rain
  There's no magic in the moon
  There's no power in this pain
  Till somewhere between heaven and earth
  I can find you again"


Somewhere Between Heaven And Earth (Cindy Bullens)










                           ______________________________________________________

"I've seen fire and I've seen rain
  I've seen lonely days that I thought would never end
  I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
  But I always thought that I'd see you again..."

        Fire And Rain (James Taylor)



                          _______________________________________________________

"I sometimes run and chase the moon
  And think of you..."


   Dreamer (Toni Childs)













                               _____________________________________________________

"Now your death is upon us and we'll return your ashes to the    
  earth

  And I know you'll take comfort in knowing you've been
  roundly blessed and cursed

  But love is a power greater than death, just like the songs
  and stories told

  And when she built you, brother, she broke the mold"


      Terry's Song (Bruce Springsteen)






                               ______________________________________________________

"There ain't no cowboys in this Connecticut town
  Not anymore, not since Sal's burned down
  Once you'd dip your tin cup in the muse's watering hole
  Or pioneer a new patch of common ground
  Then you'd lie on your time-travelled bedroll
  Quite amazed at the expansive terrain
  And if anyone said you'd never have fame and fortune,
                                                                    just that bar
  You know you'd ride that way again
  I bet you'd ride that way again"


    When Sal's Burned Down (Dar Williams)


                               ______________________________________________________

"And how did we get so lucky
  Targets on a rifle range
  Who makes the call and who gets to choose
  Who gets to win and who gets to lose
  It's like the rolling dice in the belly of the blues
  And blues never fade away..."


   Blues Never Fade Away (Elton John)










                             _____________________________________________________--


Ride WELL. Ride FREE.
Rest in peace.

PROBABLY THE BEST BEER...err..SONG IN THE WORLD EVER

All great songs hit the 10 mark when it comes to musical composition/lyrics/performance/production.

But to write a true Masterpiece the artist has to have Iconoclastic qualities.

Andy Partridge, a true Iconoclast.

Todd Rundgren as Producer, another Iconoclast.

Both holed in a volatile relationship in the studio. A track originally issued as a B-side to a single, later

appeared in the repressings of the Album "Skylarking".

A Masterpiece song should get your "Senses Working Overtime"...

Who Am I? And How The Hell Did I Crop Up In Cyprus?

This is actually a multiple choice quiz.

A) God created Adam & Eve (Book of Genesis)
B) Darwin's Theory of Evolution (Origin of the Species)
C) "We are the Cosmic Farts of the Universe" (Yet to be written book. Probable title : "'Shroom Logic")
D) "...Aliens came and f****d the monkey" ("No Missing Link" DAN BERN-LP "50 Eggs")

Now let's analyse each notion...
A) God created us to Work. Eat. Work. Drink.Work. Sleep. Work. F**k.Work. Eat. Work. Work. Work.
     Then, in His Infinite Wisdom, He dropped some seeds of the marijuana plant (we are not certain if   
      this was accidental). Now everybody knows that work and pot just don't mix. Should the milkman
      discover pot then he automatically turns to yougurtman. Cause by the time he delivers the milk.....
      The mailman delivers 2010 Xmas cards in 2012 (if he is fast enough). My brain
      is suddenly flooded with images of public servants in Cyprus...nah, maybe they're just lazy.
B) We evolved from the monkey. Maybe it's true cause some people didn't evolve enough. Why didn't
      all monkeys evolve? I know, I know, it was done by natural selection. But i'd like the Races to        
      be explained more thoroughly. If, for the sake of the argument, we assume that the Japanese evolved
      from the chimpanzee, is it safe to assume that Cypriots evolved from the baboon? (no offense to
      baboons...)
C) And when our stink dies, so do we...a bit farfetched.
D) Now here's an interesting notion and not just because of the pornography of it...just because I don't
      really believe the Human Race really belongs to this planet. Ever since Man (not Woman) stood up
      he tried to harness the powers of Nature. Tried to defeat Nature. Tried to impose himself on Nature.
      It is in the genes of Man to do so. Woman is another cup of tea altogether. She is like nature. Her
      body works in cycles just like nature. ("Sexual Personae"-CAMILLE PAGLIA).
     All in vain, of course. Consider this Justin Sullivan lyric:

      "Well we talk about saving the world now, Eddie
        It's our vanity gone mad
        She'll survive us all perfectly well
        When we're all buried and dead
        Clever monkeys with technology
        Barely out of the caves and the trees
        It's all vanity, all vanity, we try to have control
        It's all vanity, all vanity, cause chaos rules it all..."

        also, very tempted to add the rather poetic line from the same tune :

       "But the mirror never lies
         It's just these foolish eyes..." ("Vanity" NEW MODEL ARMY-LP "Impurity")

       So, what if my great-great-great-great(etc)grandfather is a little green man who Kama Sutraed
       a capuchin...or a macaque from Thailand. If i get too emotional I could fantasize that they fell in
       love but I refrain from emotionalism these days...

       "We don't belong here
         This planet was a terrarium
         Seven billion bastards
         Screaming for our Daddy"     ("No Missing Link" DAN BERN-LP "50 Eggs")


       -Hey Mister. We're Christians. We don't like what you're saying...
       -Then...forgive me...       (BILL HICKS)